I’m actually scared and overwhelmed with everything that’s currently happening with my life so far. I know I prayed for this change and been praying for my pointless love life (pointless???).
Anyways, it’s been a busy week of juggling work and school. I’ve even sacrificed my sleep hours. Oh well.
I’m currently confused with what my gut feel is saying versus my brains. I know I should not jump into conclusions and of course I’ve been waiting for this move since idk when but it simply scares me. I’m afraid because I’m not quite sure if I’m ready to be in a committed relationship. If I will try to put meaning on not so ordinary things he’s been up to lately then I can say he loves me because I’m pretty sure he likes me because we’ve been great buddies for 2 years. Love versus Like - it’s different.
I’ve got lots and lots of guy friends but we don’t actually do what what we do. The way you look at me, the way you hold my hands, the way you act and the way you treat me. It’s different… totally different.
One thing is clear in our story. You no longer love your past and all you want is to befriend her because you know you’ve hurt her. You’ve been consistent in telling me that it’s all over and that you don’t care what she says because you just want friendship and that’s all. Oh well.
So before I get too confused with all of this shits… I want to know, what now?